Kate Middleton - My Fake Diary

Monday, 24 September 2012

Dear Diary -

Going topless was the biggest mistake of my entire life. I had no idea the tremendous ruckus that showing my two little boobies would cause.

Someone in the news media pointed out that my royal rack has now been seen by more people than have seen the Eiffel Tower, the Statue of Liberty, and The Great Wall of China combined.

I am so glad that William is no longer upset with me - but his granny, Queen Lizzy, is still fit to be tied.

I have tried to explain to her how sorry I am but she just gives me an icy stare and shakes her head. The other day she shook her head so hard that her crown actually fell off and landed on her plate of crumpets.

Oh well, as they say, 'you live and learn.'

Kate Middleton