Jesus - My Fake Diary

Friday, 13 August 2010

Dear Diary:

Heavenly Father I beseech thee...get these nutbars off my back. What's with these American evangelists and crazy Popesters blaspheming my name?

Oiyveh - How many times do I have to tell them I AM NOT A CHRISTIAN. I was a decent, hard-working, loving JEWISH RABBI that you Romans crucified.

I am not of you and you are not of me. I preached universal love for all humankind, goodness and kindness and turning the other cheek.

You nuts are evil and hateful.

Shalom to the world - do not subscribe to these Philistine blasphemies in my name. You are not going to Heaven no matter what lies they tell you