David Hasselhoff - My Fake Diary

Thursday, 3 May 2007

i looked in the mirror and ejaculated at the very sight of myself. I then played some Hoff rock tunes and reminded myself that the Berlin wall was ripped down as the Germans wanted to get to my concert that same night.

I then tried to shoehorn myself into some leather trousers for my appearance on internet adverts and wrote a cheesy pop song. I am the enigmatic attention whore.