Boris Johnson - My Fake Diary

Monday, 29 September 2008

Great!! Have to make a speech today at the Tory conference. Want to make an impact. Some people say I'm really funny, but deep down this is just a mask!

I think I'll have a go at Swarzcop...Sworenigger...oh Arnie whateverisnameis. I'm like an Elephant me, I never forget. It has been 372 days and 4 hours since the Austro-Californian governer had a go at me. He said I was bumbling or fumbling or something. They're all weird in California and they've got the cheek to call us weird in London.

POT, KETTLE, BLACK... I say!!