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Topics: Kids, Manslaughter

Saturday, 25 April 2009

image for Preschooler Charged With Manslaughter

Washington DC: A preschooler, Little Johnny (name withheld because he is a minor) has been charged with multiple counts of unintentional manslaughter. Little Johnny's defense attorney said that "the defense is pleading him not guilty by virtue of environmental brainwashing and the federal government made him do it."

The defense attorney called a pre-trial press conference to explain the situation.

Little Johnny had gone with his parents to a Washington DC area hospital to visit an uncle who had been injured in a car accident. As adults do, after finding out the relative was OK, a discussion of Washington DC politics ensued. No one realized that a restless Little Johnny had wandered off.

A clanging of klaxons, bells and sirens alerted everyone in the patient's room that something was amiss at the hospital and Little Johnny was missing. At that moment a hospital security officer came into the room with a sobbing Little Johnny in tow. The officer indicated Little Johnny had indeed got himself into trouble by going into the intensive care unit (ICU).

The parents calmed Little Johnny down and asked him what he had done? Through his tears Little Johnny explained he was only doing what the public service announcement man on TV had said was a way to save energy. Little Johnny had pulled out all the ICU electrical plugs on TV sets, heart monitors and life support equipment.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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