Al-Qaeda Asks for Bailout Relief

Al-Qaeda lobbyists came to Washington to ask for $5 billion in relief so the organization can survive. They recently laid off 2000 terrorists and limited the amount of terrorist activities the remaining jihadists can partake in.

Maimammah Atoldmi, a spokesperson for Al-Qaeda, said that the economy had affected terrorism and profits are hard to come by. He fears that without the bailout money, terrorist training camps will have to close down and Al-Qaeda will have to close down as an organization.

Democrats are not overly enthusiastic about this proposal, but House Minority Leader John Boehner said that Al-Qaeda should be funded. He added that if we don't fund Al-Qaeda, then we will look foolish in the Middle East with nobody to fight.

A decision will be made by Friday.

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