Osama Bin Laden Double Dead

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 2 May 2011

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Mr Bin Laden's double (artist's impression)

There were celebrations in households across the world this evening as it became apparent that the al-Qaeda leader Osama Bin Laden's double - a man said to be even more evil and tyrannical than Mr Bin Laden himself - had been killed to death.

Mr Bin Laden's double was killed to death by US forces in Pakistan.

According to the latest US intelligence reports, the Bin Laden double was "shot to fucking pieces" in a firefight in a ground operation outside Islamabad.

Osama Bin Laden, himself, is believed to have been the mastermind behind the attacks on New York and Washington on 11 September 2001.

He is top of the US' "most wanted" list, and his unnamed double was number 7.

President Barack Obama said:

"It is the most significant achievement to date in our nation's effort to defeat al-Qaeda. It is only a matter of time before we root out Mr Bin Laden, himself."

The US has put its embassies around the world on alert, warning Americans of the possibility of al-Qaeda reprisal attacks for Bin Laden's double's killing.

Mr Bin Laden's double looked exactly like Mr Bin Laden, and, according to sources, the two were "very good friends". They shared many of the same interests - bomb-making, terrorism, hatred of the West, Muslim extremism - and were both Manchester United fans.

Mr Bin Laden tonight released a video in which he speaks highly of his double, and praises him for his many years of hard work. He says:

"Thank you, my double, for your many years of hard work."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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