Glaswegian Comes Out On Top In Study

Funny story written by grimbo

Monday, 14 February 2011

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Unexpected results regarding accents have been issued recently by Northumbria University.

The University's Social Linguistic department asked a selection of Japanese people to listen to various accents and grade them according to a number of personality traits - happiness, sadness, enthusiasm, positivity, negativity and attractiveness.

The accents used were Scottish standard English, heavily accented Japanese, moderately accented Japanese, deep south American, mid west American and , last but definitely not least, Glaswegian.

The more than 500 Japanese taking part in the study voted Glasgow top for social attractiveness.

The expressions which most appealed included :

"Geeza feel o' yer jugs, babe"

"Ah widnae throw hur oot o' bed fir eatin' buscits"

and, perhaps most poignantly :

"How dae ye like yer eggs in the moarnin' ? Hopefully, no unfertilised ."

Truth is sometimes stranger than fiction.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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