From our stereotypes desk: - Ireland was continuing to defy the rest of Europe this morning, insisting it didn't need to be bailed out by other Euro Zone members.
Partners in the zone are concerned that if Ireland's economy collapses it could take others down with it and are trying to force the former Celtice tiger to accept the bail-out.
But a spokesman for the Irish government told us: "Dese bastards are really looking for a beatin' - and we're just the ones to dish it out.
"Dey stand dere - dose Germans and French and the what-have-ye's - tellin' us what's what and just expect us to roll over. Hah! Ye feckin' bonch of ignorant gets!
"D'ye really t'ink we'd shake of the rule of the feckin' Brits just to let you take dere feckin' place?
"Just come and have a feckin' go if ye t'ink yer hard enough!"
A French Eurozone spokesman said: "Ze Ahreesh - what are zey lahk? Zey must understand what is good for zem and listen to us. Of course we are cleverer than they are."
A German spokesman added: "Ve hev vays..."
