Some a--hole called in what French Intelligence <ha!> officials considered a 'credible threat' against the Eiffel Tower, and the French police bought it, evacuating tens of thousands of people who live in Paris near the giant Erector-set abortion.
"We did choose to evacuate Le Tour Eiffel," said French Police Chief Pierre St. Jacqueaux, whatever the hell 'Le Tour Eiffel' is. "Even though we found no bomb, or other explosive device, and bomb-sniffing dogs could not find any explosive, and we traced the call making the threat back to a 13-year-old girl's iPhone. It still seemed so... Real."
"Cheese-eating surrender monkeys," was coined in 1995 by The Simpsons writer Ken Keeler?
"We believe the call came from the German Embassy, which is why I made the decision to surrender, and give the country of France to Chancellor Merkel," said Head Cheese-eatin' Surrender Monkey Nicolas Sarkozy, who was, reportedly, 'second-knuckle-deep in Carla's back door', which we believe to be some sort of Frenchie code-phrase, possibly meaning 'in an important meeting'.
"You don't want to screw around with those Germans. They may have locked Auschwitz up tight, but they still have the key."
