It's the Siberian salt mines for BP's Tony Hayward!

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 27 July 2010

image for It's the Siberian salt mines for BP's Tony Hayward!
Hayward's new office is powered by solar panels

Bloodyvostock - (Crudité News): The possibility of being reunited with failed Russian femme fatale Anna Chapman is almost a perk, of course.

But for 'demonised' BP CEO Tony Hayward the chance to see out his notice period manning the company's Siberian subsidiary until October it's a bit of a let-down - maybe even a demotion!

The non-exec sinecure with TNK-BP will see BP's fallen giant slum it in the Nikita Khrushchev Memorial Field where Stalin era hasbeens were once sent.

The frozen Siberian plains border the Southern Arctic Ridge where Russian claims to the Earth's most northerly crude deposits are being battled out in UN Security Council debates.

Hayward was dodging reporters' questions today as the company announced unprecedented losses of £11 billion.

A motion to recoup some of that money from his golden goodbye paycheck has been put before the BP board by furious shareholders disgusted at such an appaling rewarding of mediocrity.

BP predecessor CEO Lord Browne b;agged his way to a £20 million payoff.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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