Smolensk - (Tunguska Firecracker Mess): Jaroslaw Kaczynski's famous 2005 statement "The affirmation of homosexuality will lead to the downfall of civilization. No way, Jose! Not in my backside, er...backyard!" has really rattled Polish separatist lesbians again.
According to Russian security services The Furries Clubski, an eclectic women's General Colon Bowell movement, suspects Polish ex-Prime Monster Jaroslaw Kaczynski will now try to take over his dead twin's presidency of Poland.
Founding members reckon the Polish Law and Justice Party chairman "might just be" behind Saturday's air crash that killed the Polish President and his entourage.
"We think a lesbian drive-by hitsquad may now target the dead President's twin," KGB sources commented today.
Last week Russian Prime Monster Vladimir Putin blamed indiginous Chechen lesbians for the attack on the Moscow Metro which killed and injured dozens.
Today the Warsaw Lesbians Collective said to reporters "WTF??"
A state funeral for the dead President is planned for Friday.
