President George Bush Says Tiger Woods Needs To Turn Himself In

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 9 December 2009

image for President George Bush Says Tiger Woods Needs To Turn Himself In
George Bush listening to a reporter asking him about Tiger Woods "Golf Gate."

DALLAS - Former President George Bush has finally chimed in on the Tiger Woods "Golf Gate" mess.

Speaking from the front porch of his double-wide trailer in Dallas, Bush said that Tiger Woods needs to do the right thing and turn himself in.

And good old "W" said "Mr. Trigger needs to do it as soon as possible so that the country can get back to doing what it's supposed to be doing and that's focusing on President Barracuda Alabama and the way the bro is running things."

Bush went on to say that the country needs to be worrying about health care, and jobs, and what little two-bit friggin' country we need to be invading next.

The former president grinned and said, "Hell the skinny little fella sure must have one big (blank) on him to be attractin' the good lookin' heifers that he is.

When told that maybe it's the millions and millions of dollars he has Bush just smiled and nodded his head.

He grinned and said "Yes sir Mr. Trigger sure used to be one damn good golfer. The skinny little negro was one happy little cheatin' son-of-a-bitch wasn't he?

Bush was asked how his latest book is going. He replied that it's going good. He said that he has narrowed the books title down to two choices. The first is The Lie About The Weapons of Mass Destruction and Why Exactly I Had To Lie About It, and the second one is Everything Was Dick Cheney's Fault And Let Me Show Y'all Why and How.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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