Humane Society Turns Out to Honour Skoob at Historic Birthday Bash: Bar Stool Retired!

Funny story written by Morse

Wednesday, 9 December 2009

image for Humane Society Turns Out to Honour Skoob at Historic Birthday Bash: Bar Stool Retired!

A horde of international revelers turned out to honour Spoof prodigy Skoob 1999 as he was feted, ironically on his birthday, for his contribution to humanity and for his untiring efforts to preserve free speech and back yard wild life.

The celebration, held at the historic Ship Anson Pub in this historic naval port, which rivaled the celebration when they brought Admiral Nelson's body home in a barrel of rum. Arriving late, and pickled, Skoob was rolled in wearing a full length mink coat with a hoodie, which was somewhat unfortunate due to the unscheduled announcement by the Humane Society that he was also going to be named "Man of the Year' for his unselfish support of keeping domestic wabbits in the garden and out of the stew pot.

Owner of the Ship Anson, Sir Hillary Morgan, RN (retired) was on hand and in a tearful ceremony retired Skoob's Barstool, scars and all, from its position next to the men's room door, where it had remained since 1731 after being commissioned by a former pirate who was later hanged, and then drawn and quartered unmercifully in The Spoof Forum.

Spoof Journalist Abel Rodriquez was on hand and was the lead presenter for the evening detailing the meteoric rise of The Skoob who in just over a year managed to publish 990 spoof stories, 68 magazine articles, 67 snippets, and 3 jokes....a task which Abel described as 'mutantly obscene', but not in a snarky way!

In an emotional acceptance speech, Skoob graciously acknowledged his long suffering wife of over 20 years, Mrs. Skoob, for standing behind him.

"I know it hasn't been easy all this time," Skoob sniffled, " but I love this woman with all my heart, even though she never reads my stuff, she always stood up for me, and the occasional beatings I've received have only made me a better man."

Mrs. Skoob refused to come to the podium as she was on her cell phone berating Monkey Woods in Thailand for being unable to attend due to a being in medical quarantine for writing a particularly viral spoof piece for the local paper.

When asked what he thought of the ceremonies, Canadian Spoofer V. Nicholas summed it up: "Nice," he said briefly.

"F********awesome" volunteered JO.

"What a guy" volunteered MB, " but a bit F******old, ain't he?"

Found at the juice bar, veteran JMan said, "Ya can't beat him with a stick...!"

"Next to me ," said Fernando Monte Verde, " he surely must be the world's most interesting man, though under endowed."

QM's Re TORT for the evening was....."Bloody fools wouldn't even be here, except for the free drinks.....sodding footies!"

Spoof Editor Mark Lowton had several comments, but if repeated, this account would have a warning label affixed to it. Concerned contributors took his bike away from him early, and sent him home in a cab for his own protection.

Bureau summed up the Evening: It's a sad statement when an old 'sod' shows up for his own party, and can't even get laid.....

Over at table 5, back to the wall, Morse kept an eye on the festivities ,smiled in contentment, and hoisted one for the entire Spoof Crew!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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