President Hava Nodinnajaquet has been sworn in as president of Iran followig his non-fixed win of a non-fixed election with non-fixed election results.
The religious leader of Iran's governing body, Mullah Allmytee, swore the president in with the words "I am now swearing you in. F**k off up to your bl**ding preseidential palace you ignorant peasant b*st*rd son of a wh*re. And keep your fat b*ll*xing feet off the f*ck*ng furniture, you worthless piece of sh*t."
The President then continued his attack on western countries, blamed by the Iranian status quo for stirring up unrest after the election, although both Francis Rossi and Rick Parfitt, speaking from the East End's "Shave and Spew" pub, categorically deny having ever had anything to do with Iran.
President Nodinnajaquet provided written proof for the heavily-censored media that he gained almost 113% of the votes cast in the election.
Many opposition leaders and political figures have declared their interest in swearing out the president.
In fact, liberal cleric, Mulla Almostbutnotquitenormal, said that a simple "F*ck Off" to the president should please the West and get Iran back in the world's good books.