On the feast of Sts Peter and Paul who in real life couldn't stand each others guts, Pope Benedict the Sixteenth, whose guts are hated by lots of people, announced that he found the great saints bones. Benedict who has rejected the carbon dating that identified the Shroud of Turin as coming from the 15th century, praised the scientific method for placing the early heroes bones in the first century.
Archaeologists were persuaded to agree with the identification since the first century skeleton was found headless in keeping with the tradition that the Apostle to the Gentiles was beheaded. In addition a genetic study of the bone fragments showed a strong tendency toard hating women, gays and sex in general. This is Paul alright, Benedict who also discriminates in the same three areas, said: That's my boy!
Scientists denied three times to confirm that the other skeleton belonged to the disciple Jesus dubbed The Rock.