Are You Many Making Plans To Die This Winter?

Funny story written by Bureau

Monday, 22 June 2009

image for Are You Many Making Plans To Die This Winter?

With the latest unrest around the world and more radical nations having access to nuclear weapons, people are slowly getting it through their heads that this coming winter could be their last.

"All it takes is for one nuclear blast to a major city and even if there's only limited response, the whole atmosphere is shot for years", stated a Professor Ingraham on a new Think Tank appropriately called Project Armageddon."

"People can continue to bury their heads in the sand. Al Gore can warn about global warming bring a catastrophe in the future but we simply don not have that long."

Another Think Tank speaker, a Doctor Jemanez then spoke.

"No one wants to admit the solar flares are coming and could happen within months. When they do, kiss the internet and mayby your whole banking account good-bye. Everything that doesn't have a back-up system."

"The whole world is basically bankrupt."

"There are people all around the world that will cheer a US failure", stated Professor Ingraham, "especially the Muslim countries. Little realizing that the US is the breadbasket of the world and with the US needing it's own food for it's own people, it won't be coming out. Many nations may have nothing or may have plenty of oil and gold but YOU CAN'T EAT OIL & GOLD!"

Both men agreed as did the conclusion of the Think Tank that it's no longer "preparing for what might happen, but that it's already hear."

"And we haven't even hit upon the dirty bombs or the diseases growing eveyday and changing everyday."

"Plus there no place on earth to hide from any of these things!"

Their conclusions: Get your minds off trivia and at least store some basic food, water and first aid supplies.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more