New Training Piece For Psychology Students

Funny story written by Kidney Stone

Monday, 11 May 2009

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"If x + y = an MP, then when this idiot is raised to the power of government ..."

Students in New South Wales have been piloting a new technique for treating psychological problems after psychologists who were trying to treat a patient decided to use his reluctance and explanations as to why he refused treatment to modify treatments and make them more suitable for patients who are more intelligent that have psychological problems.

Mr. Brian Box, who was a gifted child, was let down by the state and subjected to years of emotional abuse, unfairness, bullying and more, but his natural abilities managed to keep his way of thinking one step ahead of others even if he wasn't given an education to make the most of his potential or training to have a professional career.

However, Mr. Box was professional in his own way because only he could understand his way of thinking and nobody gave him any credibility for his intelligence and theories, and like many past geniuses Mr. Box became alienated, felt rejected, started having psychological problems and occasionally contemplated suicide. Mr. Box was too unpopular due to a lack of understanding which made him feel held to ransom by others' inabilities.

Less thought up ideas were more popular and deemed "better thought up" when in fact they weren't better thought up but more acceptable to the less intelligent. Unpopularity, not due to being disliked but mostly down to a lack of appreciation of his intelligence made Mr. Box reluctant to accept anything tailored in favour of the less intelligent which was made look more sophisticated but Mr. Box knew it wasn't more sophisticated but just more popular and therefore more acceptable for the majority.

The more Mr. Box tried the more alienation he experienced as well as being punished and ridiculed more.

This went on for a number of years and doctors felt that it was time Mr. Box was recommended to see a psychologist to help him overcome the problems he had experienced in the past, and so this is where psychologists realised the importance of Mr. Boxes' understanding and experiences.

At first, one of the psychologists Dr. Headcase gave Mr. Box a consultation and was worried at the reluctance of Mr. Box to accept his recommendations and suggestions. Mr. Box seemed to have an answer which contradicted Dr. Headcase's recommendations and claimed these recommendations would not do anything to help him improve because they were only fooling the brain into believing something false.

Dr. Headcase asked Mr. Box if he would be willing for some students to come in and witness the remaining time of the consultation and ask questions, which could be valuable and Mr. Box was happy to accept.

Three students then joined Dr. Headcase and Mr. Box and the students were also mystified at Mr. Boxes' reluctance too.

When the consultation was over, the three students and Dr Headcase all agreed that Mr. Box had some in depth understanding of what had gone on and did not see life by face values. Most treatment was given at face value which helped make the patient feel better but Mr. Box could see the distortions and knowing how he had been treated he could see it was a similar ploy and to help him instead of undermine him, but because it wasn't honest and truthful he rejected the treatment.

So Dr. Headcase decided to ask Mr. Box if he would like to help the sufferers by analysing various treatments, accepting or rejecting and explaining why he chose to accept or reject the treatment. Mr. Box agreed to give it a try and other psychologists at Beginbridge University were amazed at the detail which Mr. Box gave and where the flaws were. Mr. Box referred to these flaws as "inversions of the truth" where small is made look bigger than big and when things were what could be malicious in real life as "evil charlatanism".

They decided to conduct a study into treating people of higher intelligence because the more intelligent someone is the more likely they are to have psychological problems and the more difficult it is to treat an intelligent person because of their awareness and logical reasoning. The results have been quite remarkable said Dr. Tim Burr, a leading psychologist who specialises in Tree Psychology, which links together all factors contributing towards the problem and how they are related - like a family tree. Dr. Burr explained that by not barking up the wrong tree but ironing out the flaws made more intelligent people with psychological problems accept treatment more, so everything they came across they asked Mr. Box to scrutinise and give his verdict. If he spotted something obvious it would be done, but even if it wasn't obvious but here as a gut feeling that something wasn't right they also wanted Mr. Box to include this too, or any feelings of uncertainty or suspicion.

Mr. Box would show how a straight path wasn't necessarily the quickest route from A to B when there were obstacles which had to be climbed over which could take a long time to get past. Mr. Box took the students on a journey which took them round the bend quite a lot as it wasn't a straightforward journey.

Mr. Box identified every treatment which had been proven to work as acceptable and every treatment with a low success rate as a failure and so has been appointed as a treatment assessor because of his natural perception within him to tell whether it is right or wrong and Mr. Box didn't need any training for this role.

Students have become very much attached as friends to Mr. Box for his genuine advice and the help he has given them by letting them know what matters to him. If they can convince Mr. Box that the treatment is good then it is likely to be accepted by the majority of patients (over 98%) whereas if he rejects it then it is only suitable for patients of the lower intelligence which accounts for 60%.

Leading psychologists have been reported saying that this treatment will help trainee psychologists to perceive what it is like round the bend and not just what is straight ahead of them.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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