Man finds solitary remaining new way to masturbate, exhausts it

Funny story written by NGDM

Tuesday, 3 February 2009

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In an emotional rollercoaster of a journey last night, a local man uncovered the solitary remaining exciting way to masturbate that had been out of his reach for some time.

The joy, quickly turned to sadness for that man however, as the thrill of the exciting new find was replaced by convulsions of shame as hey lay there for the following hour shaking his head silently.

The shame was so thorough that he did not even attempt the usual ritual of reaching for his boxer shorts to wipe himself down, instead he just lay there, he lay there with the cold remnants oozing down his pale body.

Looking in the mirror this morning was far from easy, first he had to overcome the evermore powerful gag reflex that kicked in upon making eye contact with himself. Calling himself a piece of shit he pondered where was left to go from here.

Will masterbation make you go blind? No, but eventually you'll wish it did.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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