Chavez Expels US Ambassador...Clears Way for More Drug Trafficking!

Funny story written by Morse

Friday, 12 September 2008

image for Chavez Expels US Ambassador...Clears Way for More Drug Trafficking!
Chavez to US: "BLOW ME!'

Caracas,Vn/ Rolling Stone Magazine - Venezuela's Socialist President, Hugo Chavez cleared the way for his new economic Drug Trading Pact with Russia by expelling the US Ambassador, and terminating cooperation with US DEA agents. The action follows suit to a similar response from Boliva.

The action also corresponds with the arrival of two Russian bombers to be used as transport to expand Venezuela's lucrative drug trade, now responsible for up to 80% of the world's cocaine and heroin distribution.

Chavez, calling the trade agreement with Russia a "Stimulus Package" , said profits from the new agreement would trickle down to the average airport baggage handler at the country's airports and supplement the almost $2 million in bribes being dispensed monthly, mostly to high ranking members of the national guard.

DEA agents said Venezuela was distributing over half the crop of cocaine currently being produced in Columbia by FARC, a right wing militant group Chavez supports, amounting to over 100 tons of Blow a year. The white powder is then distributed evenly between the US, through Mexico, and Europe.

Chavez further ranted that there would be no new Ambassador in Caracas until after the election in the US. He said he would prefer to deal one on one with Barack Obama and Nancy Pelosi in congenial talks about a more open Drug Trade Agreement with them as a means to pay for the Democrats' costly Federal give-away programs, and a "Win-Win" for both countries.

Manuel Noreaga, former Panama President, and "King of Coke", was still in jail in the US and unable to comment on Chavez's new policies.

Meanwhile, the Pentagon denied reports that the crack Delta Force Drug Interdiction Team was placed on full alert and had met for a briefing with VP Candidate Sarah Palin at an undisclosed military air base close to the situation.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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