America and Britain to Boycott the Olympics Due to Japanese Participation

Funny story written by matwil

Monday, 12 May 2008

The governments of the United States and Great Britain today announce a formal boycott of the Chinese Olympics, due to the participation of a team from Japan.

Speaking from the White House, outgoing President, George 'Cloney' Bush, said: 'We cannot tolerate the human rights abuses by the Japamese people any more. Heck, they killed so many Americans I had to dodge the draft!'

And a spokesman for British Army veterans said: 'My body is still deformed after the Japanese tortured me, and they weren't just killers, they murdered an entire city in China, men, women and children. The Chinese are a decent and honourable people, when will that chimpanzee in Washington shut up?'

A spokesgeishagirl in Tokyo said: 'We understand concerns about Nippon, but our country couldn't care less, if you mugs want to blame the Chinese and let us off with genocide, you're dumber than you look. More tea?' And speaking from his grave, in Arlington, Charlton 'Massacre' Heston added: 'Huh? Didn't the Limeys go to the Moscow Olympics in 1980? I can smell all the hypocrisy flying around even though I'm dead, it's that bad.'

But leader of the American team, Ronald McDonald, said: '$$$$$$$, kerching!'

A Swiss banker was unavailable for comment, at his usual million-franc fee, and Mao Tse-Tung was as inscrutable as ever.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more