Written by Chuck Barber

Saturday, 8 May 2004

image for Georgia to Shun Evolution in Schools
Kathy Cox -- Not Descended From A Monkey

If State Superintendent of Education Kathy Cox has her way Georgia school kids will graduate from high school having learned nothing about evolution; in fact likely they will have never even heard the word uttered in a science class.

New ‘science' standards espoused by Cox would eliminate the word ‘evolution' and replace it with "anti-God so-called science" and would replace teaching the generally accepted theory of evolution with "Creation Science," a Biblically approved theory of the development of the cosmos featuring an activist God -- Space God Jehovah One.

Teachers, and other critics of the proposals, have launched several efforts to convince Cox that the proposals are wrongheaded. A web site: www.kathycox_sucker.org featuring a petition opposed to the changes launched yesterday, and beginning Monday opponents will begin an email and phone campaign designed to demonstrate the strength in numbers of those in favor of continuing to teach evolution in Georgia classrooms.

In a statement released late Friday Cox reiterated her stance and her support for approaching science in a more balanced manner. "For over a hundred years our children have been taught that evolution is science and that science is truth. For all that time no one in the public schools has even mentioned the science of Creationism. Where is the balance in that? We will have to teach Creationism exclusively for the next one hundred years to reach a balance! The Bible does not even mention physics and for example, speaks only of measures in cubits. We have been teaching physics for hundreds of years, and no one teaches about cubits. School children today are appallingly ignorant of cubit based technology."

Asked about her training in traditional science Cox, a graduate of the Locust Grove Baptist School of Christian Knowledge, just shook her head, "I never wasted my time with that superstitious nonsense. I could watch NOVA every night for a year and still I'd never believe that monkeys banging on cocoanuts in the jungle invented Morse code, or that just because an apple falls to the ground that Jupiter is tugging on me right now trying to pull me into outer space."

Scientists from various universities in Georgia decried the decision as a step backwards in education, noting that students from Georgia will be at a disadvantage when competing with students from other states where evolution is taught. Cox was having none of that, "I've heard all the complaints from these scientists that Georgia students will be unable to compete if they attend colleges out of state. The answer there is obvious, isn't it? They'll always be welcome at the colleges in Georgia."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: School, Kids

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