The President of Iran, Iva Gotta Nodinnajacket, has confessed, in a no-holds-barred interview, that when he's not threatening Israel or learning to read, he has a penchant for calling out bingo numbers at his local bingo hall.
In a frank and exclusive interview granted to the political correspondent from the UK's "Exchange and Mart", President Nodinnajacket explains how, as a young boy, when being brought up in his parents' peasant shack, learning how to hate "non believers", he always made time to count to 100.
When he became president, he sought advice from two of Iran's best known sages, Ayatollah Ladbroke and Ayatollah Williamhill, as to how he could put his only talent (aside from warmongering) to best use.
Realising the value of his ability to count to 100 without a safety net or nuclear device, he immediately trialled his ability at his local bingo hall Macca, named after the famous Beatle because he'd have to chop his own hands off had it been called Mecca.
He has been clandestinely calling numbers for the past 14 years, and hopes to progress to counting to 200 as soon as possible.
