Written by kungfuiceskater

Sunday, 2 May 2004

image for Al-Qaeda In Talks To Form Alliance with Ku Klux Klan; Jerry Springer a Potential Stumbling Block.
Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

Citing similarities in strategic objectives: "The elimination of the United States Government and the destruction of the Jewish State", Al-Qaeda today announced that it was close to finalizing a strategic alliance with the Ku Klux Klan. Inside sources have informed writer KungFu IceSkater, that Osama and the Grand Wizard of the KKK are attempting to iron out some difficult, final differences as follows:

Grand Wizard: "I'm not sure that I agree with clause 1 of paragraph 9 regarding sharing our clothes. Sure our clothes look alike but we're scared as hell of contracting desert scabies. No offence, but that's a deal killer right there!"

Osama: "Desert scabies? We drive around in Rolls Royces. You son of a…. O.K. no swapping clothes."

Grand Wizard: "Well, we promise not to use slurs like "desert bunnies" to describe you guys."

Osama: Great. "Well, we promise not to call you guys "microwave hog stew eating cave dwellers."

Grand Wizard: "Good, well we promise not to call you guys "death-defyingly smelly"."

Osama: "O.K. Now are we gonna need to lock our 13 year old boys and girls up when you guys come here for conventions?"

Grand Wizard: "I don't get it."

Osama: "I hear you guys like to "do it" with jail bait."

Grand Wizard: "Isn't that right there a case of the pot calling the kettle black you desert bun……..O.K. you might have a point there. While you're at it, you probably want to lock you're sheep up too."

Osama: "Well, I have no more comments, looks like we have a deal."

Grand Wizard: "I think you might be right, you ain't too bad a guy Osama."

Osama: "You know, something I've always wanted is a Dodge, hemmy pick up truck."

Grand Wizard: "Excuse me?"

Osama: "I've always wanted a Dodge pick up truck."

Grand Wizard: "Now, now Osama, slow your role, you're overstepping your boundaries. A Dodge is a fine American truck made of pure Aryan blood. You don't hear me going around asking for camels do you?"

Osama: "You sheep-molester, I drive Rolls Royces and Mercedes Benzes custom built."

Grand Wizard: "Yeah, well you live in a rat hole, at least I live in a trailer park. When was the last time you watched TV."

Osama: "Oh yeah, I hear Jerry Springer is your step father."

Grand Wizard: "You crossed the line there buddy. How dare you suggest my step father not to be of pure Aryan blood. I'm not sure about this strategic alliance any more."

Osama: "You're not sure. Well check this out. I declare Jihad on the Ku Klux Klan."

Grand Wizard: "There'll be a burning cross in front of your rat hole by 10 a.m."

Osama: "I'm not worried about your burning cross. Not only am I locking my kids up, I am locking up sheep, cows, donkeys and even camels."

Grand Wizard: F.U.

Osama: No F.U.

Grand Wizard: No F.U.

Osama: No F.U……………………………..

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Government, al-Qaeda

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