Ugly protests sour Milf Milk launch

Funny story written by Fergus McCarthy

Sunday, 9 March 2008

image for Ugly protests sour Milf Milk launch
Stereotypical Milf Milk supplier.

'Milf Milk' was launched today amidst howls of derision from seemingly tens of thousands of ugly women.

27 mingers had assembled outside the gates of the Virgin breast milk processing facility in Upper Titterton North Yorks this evening whilst news agencies world wide are reporting gatherings of 10 pinters numbering as few as 5 in Sydney to a so far unconfirmed 30,000 in Gateshead.

Marianne Bigbit spokeswoman for the overweight and ugly gave an exclusive interview to our undercover fat fucker Jimmy Cheesestrings and unwittingly gave us an insight into the shady world of the bitter and obese.

"Milf milk is an insult" Ms Bigbit raged. "We are all mothers, a mothers love is unconditional, our breast milk is of the same quality as a so called Milf and we generally produce an awful lot more of it than those self obsessed skinny bitches.

Virgin spokesman Dave Nipllelicker read out a company statement to the worlds media outlining the the companies position on Milf milk.

"Virgin Milk have carried out extensive and exhaustive research into the marketing potential of Milf Milk and we feel that a big ol herd of overweight tracksuit wearing suppliers would not portray the particular image we have in mind for 'Milf Milk"

Our research shows that 'Virgin' Milf customers prefer good looking extremely rideable suppliers.

SO the rest of you fat bastards can 'Fuck Off!'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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