Sydney Harbour bridge closed indefinitely

Funny story written by Bullshot Bill

Sunday, 18 November 2007

image for Sydney Harbour bridge closed indefinitely
Masthead of "EL RUSTO BUCKETO"

A transport accident has left Sydney Harbour bridge closed for an indefinite period. During the morning rush hour a truck laden with 800 manholes crashed in the northbound lanes, spilling it's load over 5 traffic lanes and the railway line.

Several cars and at least one motorcycle plunged through the holes before the traffic halted. A number of holes fell through the roadway and several landed on the Liberian registered bulk carrier EL RUSTO BUCKETO which promptly and efficiently sank to the harbour bottom.

NSW Premier Maurie Yemma said that until engineers had assessed the bridge's structural integrity, had their lunch, and calculated how many manhole covers were needed to carry out repairs, the bridge must remain closed. "We only have about 30 manhole covers in stock, so we are appealing for public donations." said Mr. Yemma. "I intend introducing an Emergency Bill which will make the hoarding of manhole covers an offense punishable by transportation to England for 7 years."

When asked about the fate of EL RUSTO BUCKETO, The Premier said it will be cut up and moved within days, which will be relatively easy because a number of holes that fell through the bridge are draining the harbour. He said that this will obviously end the debate about the need for a second tunnel under the harbour, and 'stop the greenies whining about the polluted water. He also advised local residents to take advantage of the cheap seafood which will be available for the next few days thanks to his government's sound financial management.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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