UN Security Council calls Emergency Meeting to consider Mills votes

Funny story written by MOC

Thursday, 1 November 2007

image for UN Security Council calls Emergency Meeting to consider Mills votes

The United Nations Security Council has called a special emergency meeting for tomorrow. The move followed the public declaration by Heather Mills McCartney, the soon to be ex-wife of Paul McCartney, known affectionately in the British press as Lady Mucca, that she is "responsible for nine countries."

Mills made her claim on Wednesday, October 31, on Radio 4. It came after talk show host Fran Britton asked her why she did not simply ignore the unfair negative press she says she has experiencing since her pending divorce from the Cute One was announced last summer.

In reply, Ms Mills said she "is responsible for nine countries" and needed to continue with her "numerous campaigns." Since Ms Mills did not identify the specific countries, a UN investigation is to be launched.

The current Secretary General, Ban Ki-Moon, expressed his concern that Ms Mills might be entitled to at least nine votes in the General Assembly. Such a concentration of votes in the hands of one person is said to be causing consternation among the members of the Security Council. However, several Middle Eastern countries have stated they are in total support of Ms Mills being given all nine of the votes, given her previous warm and intimate relationships with countless Arabs in London.

Paul McCartney, 69, refused to comment.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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