Belgian Jazz War Continues

Written by newsinfoplus

Tuesday, 28 August 2007

image for Belgian Jazz War Continues
Soldiers prepare an ordinance strike through their saxophones and harmonicas.

The ferocious fighting in Belgium has continued into its twenty first day as chocolate making militia attack jazz musicians who are currently defending the capital, Brussels.

The war, started due to a difference of opinion between chocolatiers and clarinettists, soon spread through the entire jazz industry. The chocolate workers now control almost all of the Walloon (French speaking) region, and around half of the northern Flemish region.

Only the north eastern quarter bordering the Netherlands is still controlled by jazz. However last week an entire colony of bebop singers defected to the south, following the lead of Malèves-Sainte-Marie-Wastines, an area heavily influenced by Louis Armstrong, who surrendered last Saturday.

The EU has called a state of emergency, but is unable to act effectively since most of its MEPs are trapped within the city and NATO's command staff are currently locked in a nuclear fallout shelter, without access codes, or communication, and are therefore trapped, until stability can be restored to Brussels.

The UK and US governments have refused to send in troops because they have been given permission and that is not how they believe a military operation should work. What will happen is anyone's guess.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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