Controversial U.S Pastor Fred Phelps enrages Irish farmers, Prisoners and Confectionary employees

Written by Fergus McCarthy

Wednesday, 8 August 2007

image for Controversial U.S Pastor Fred Phelps enrages Irish farmers, Prisoners and Confectionary employees
Prisoner 923452 "Big Micky" Dublins MountJoy Jail.

Outspoken Gay Icon U.S Pastor Fred Phelps has incurred the wrath of Ireland's farmers, Chocolate makers and prisoners after posting on his website "Godhatesireland" some rather strange comments about "Filthy Celtic Fudge Packer" and "Irish Rump Ranger"

A spokesman for Cadbury Ireland refuted Mr Phelp's claims: "All our employees are given a good rub down when they come at work...Sorry! To work"

Michael Glennon,' Friendly Farmers Ass', said: "We also do a great fillet"

Mr Phelps had been invited to attend a debate at The prestigious University College Dublin Literary and Historical Society on the subject of gay adoption next February when he accused the L and H leaders of attempting to lure him to Ireland with the sole purpose of having him arrested under Ireland's "Incitement to Hatred act" and having him share a cell with "Big Micky" in Ireland's notorious and aptly named "Mount Joy" jail.

He wrote on his website:

Think openly-gay, out-of-the-closet Irish Senator David Norris, represented by former Irish President Mary Robinson before the European Court of Human (fag) Rights.

Here's what Ireland's Satanic, fag-inspired criminal law says: "It shall be an offence for a person to use words that are threatening, abusive or insulting and are likely to stir up hatred against a group of persons on account of their sexual orientation."

If I just stand up there in Dublin and quote Lev. 18:22 - nothing more - every fag in Ireland will be screaming bloody murder: Help! Help! Officer! Officer! That man used some abusive and insulting words that are likely to stir up hatred against me as a filthy Celtic Fudge-Packer and Irish Rump Ranger. Arrest that man! Prosecute that man! Fine that man 10,000 lbs and 2 years in jail for each offense. It's the law!

Senator David Norris graciously insisted that Pastor Phelps had misread the invitation adding that an awful lot of Gay students in Ireland were up for adoption while studying in Dublin as the cost of rental accommodation was just plain crazy.

Former President Robinson said "he's obviously a donkeys dick, we do not send pensioners to prison in Ireland for "Incitement to Hatred".

We made Ian Paisley the the Northern Ireland First Minister and he's a crazy old Protestant."

Big Micky in Mount Joy Jail was quoted as saying: "No amount of Heroin would make dat ol' bastard attractive, Anywaysanallananyways ya couldn listen to him Wha?"

Angelina Jolie is being lined up as a replacement as it's well known she will adopt anyone.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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