Written by queen mudder

Thursday, 21 June 2007

Tel Aviv - (Ass Mess): The Israeli security/intelligence service in-house journal MyMossad Monthly has gone topless in a recruitment drive to attract a beefier type of male into the renowned spooks' agency.

Four female soldiers appear semi-naked in the July issue in a photo-feature entitled The Women of the Israel Defence Force.

Military service is compulsory for all women aged 18 and over in Israel. But in the last few years numbers have dwindled after male soldiers complained that all the pretty girls were finding legitimate excuses to duck their stint and the ranks were filled with 'hairy fat old dykes looking like Rosie O'Donnell or Andrea Dworkin'.

The topless shots have angered some women MPs however, who have criticised the foreign ministry for 'whoring for recruits'.

And equality campaigners inside the Knesset are now demanding nude male counterpart shots in subsequent editions "so young Israeli women know what the talent is" on par footing.

The July issue of the magazine has already sold out and its website has been inundated with over half a million hits forcing periodic shutdowns of the service after bandwidth became strained under the unexpected pressure.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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