Newsflash for New Agers: Trusting the universe is a bad idea

Funny story written by Earthvessel

Tuesday, 13 July 2021

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The Norse trickster god Loki may be in charge after all

It seems the more we learn about our world and solar system, the worse the New Age movement looks. It’s commonly known that many modern-day seekers are inclined to believe in the goodness of The Universe and the importance of getting into the flow. These days the call to ‘trust the universe’ is often heard.

Now it turns out this way of thinking is based on faulty assumptions. A series of experiments conducted at Stanford University have shown conclusively that what some call “wishful thinking” actually creates an adverse effect on events that follow.

Stanford’s Wilbur Steinfeller, the study’s chief researcher explains: “In other words, the universe makes us work for everything. It can also, at random times, punish people trying silly shortcuts. That’s what the study showed us.”

In recent years we learned through quantum physics, that matter (particles) behave differently depending on whether they are being watched or not. As it turns out, that should have been the tip-off, because that implies we are being observed and our observer seems to enjoy trifling with us.

Many ancient cultures believed in this world was created and is overseen by a trickster god, and these latest research results seem to back that assertion. With the Stanford experiments continuing through the summer and early fall, we expect to learn more so stay tuned!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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