Written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 13 February 2019

image for Man Loves His Wife So Much, He Hasn't Got The Heart To Tell Her That Her Dress Is Absolutely Fucking Garish
This man's shirt is chillingly similar

A man has confessed that he loves his wife so very much, that he doesn't have the heart to tell her that her new dress, which she adores, and wears at every opportunity, is so profoundly garish, he almost vomits every time he sees it.

The dress, a navy blue affair, with yellow and pink flowers, and green foliage, which zips up at the back, makes the man's guts churn, and his head swim whenever his otherwise-wonderful wife puts it on.

The man, who couldn't possibly be identified, because his wife would be mortified if she knew how he felt about the dress, spoke in hushed tones as he told me about the situation at the weekend.

Indeed, the whole scenario had the potential to destabilize the man's marriage to such an extent, that this story, itself, was almost binned before submission, but due to an error

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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