Just when US nutritionists, anorexics and bulimics were desperately looking for an object lesson down comes Barzan Ibrahim, henchman of Saddam Hussein ,also known as the Dessertman of Baghdad.
Bassam Ridha ,spokesperson for the Iraqi President, apologized for not weighing Barzan: "He asked us not to weigh him. He said this was the reason he never went to Weight Watchers. He hated being weighed and judged by others".
"When we lynched him", Iraqi Hangman and High Executioner, Texas Bobby Jo Stringimup commented: "His head just snapped off like an ear on a stalk of corn!.There was nothin' we could do."
Government officials, trained by Bush White House PR men began the spin almost immediately. Barzan was called "thickset" and the decapitation was called "inadvertent". Iraqi spin doctor, Mohammed Lyingdog demonstrated his proficiency after attending a Republican conference entitled: "We Decide the Truth". Lyingdog created the now famous press release: "The Thickset inadvertently decapitate themselves".
Meanwhile US members of STAVRE, Society for the Vehement Refusal to Eat, declared Ibrahim : "The Father of All Obesity" and displayed his decapitated corpse on all of their latest public service announcements. Their new slogan has appeared everywhere: "You never know when you might get hung, don't lose your head and get stung...diet like your execution is tomorrow!".
