Osama Bin Tuchas has escaped from Paradise and boy is he pissed off, claims Brigadier General Moishe Pipick a spokesman for Mossad. (Israeli's intelligence service)
He stated: "Osama arrived in paradise expecting his promised pool full of hot Virgins and all the other goodies preachers said would be his if he blew up a Sunni wedding party but Osama described what Paradise REALLY is like:
"The water was full of camel shit and the so called Virgins were a bunch of ugly diseased whores from Tehran."
Osama went on, "I am the first suicide bomber to escape from their shithole of a Paradise and let me tell my brothers - Paradise is a real crap hole -even WORSE than where you now live."
General Pipick said, "This is gonna put a real crimp in the number of suicide freako pschopaths they can recruit. And now that Mossad has spies in their stinky Paradise we will be able to help others to escape,"
"Sure will" said Osama - to say nothing of the fact that while i managed to escape -i have no arms or legs or cock -and only one ball."
He concluded: "OH - and the food is worse than garbage and their is no toilet paper like the Mullas promised us!"
