West Virginia, Kentucky, Tennessee & Arkansas Outlaw Brother/Sister Marriages

Written by Bureau

Sunday, 23 January 2011

image for West Virginia, Kentucky, Tennessee & Arkansas Outlaw Brother/Sister Marriages
Uncle Papaw!

While gay people cannot marry in any of these states, all four have been allowing marriages within their own families, a tradition handed down from when there WERE no other people around within 50 miles to marry.

"We thought it over and since we can't let no gays marry here bouts, we reckon we'll have to stop that same-family marriage thingy", stated Elmer Dude of Deer Lick, Arkansas. "Besides, our family always managed to haul off a cousin from the other mountain ever filth generatnation."

"In a way, I'm glad that there simpling marrying simpling, own brother and sister, was more trouble than it was worth", stated Wesley Jenkins and his sister, Mrs. Jenkins agreed.

"I can recall Pa telling us while he took us on our honeymoon to an old abandoned house up in the hills that he was tired of us asking waz we thar yet, waz we thar yet? He threatened to give us a shore-nuff hidin' and make us walk the 45 miles of dirt road", stated Mrs Jenkins.

"Yep", stated Wesley. "And you always get all balled up with that Uncle Palpa and sech. This will improve our kids learnin' too."

"Well, they haint plum idgets now you know."

"Are too!"

Ain't done it!"

"Are too."

"Uncle Papaw! Wesley done said our kids waz idgets again!"

"Did not!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more