EPA to Investigate Chicago Water System

Funny story written by Philbert of Macadamia

Sunday, 21 November 2010

image for EPA to Investigate Chicago Water System
"It's in the water!"

Chicago IL: EPA Administrator Lisa Jackson met with Mayor Richard Daley to discuss a planned investigation of Chicago water quality. The EPA feels that Chicago water may be somewhat responsible for the gangsters and politicians that have emerged in this city over the last 100 years.

There is evidence to suggest that Mrs. O'Leary's cow started the Great Chicago Fire in 1871 by kicking over a lantern in the lady's barn. However, that problem was due to the lack of an adequate water supply.

The EPA's concern is with what caused the emergence of: gangsters like Al Capone and Sam Giancana (successor to Al Capone); corrupt politicians like former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich, former Senator Carol Moseley Braun and former Senator Raymond Burris; and current politicians like President Barack Obama (born in Honolulu, Hawaii), former Presidential Chief of Staff/Chicago Mayoral Candidate Rahm Emanuel and Senior Presidential Advisor David Axelrod. (Presidential Press Secretary Robert Gibbs is from Alabama.)

If the EPA finds nothing wrong with the Chicago water system then Lake Michigan, the source of Chicago water, will be investigated as well as studying Chicago air quality.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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