Newt Gingrich in Wisconsin to Stump for Big Idiot

Funny story written by UWGB-Beek

Wednesday, 27 October 2010

Waukesha, WI -- Newt Gingrich was in Wisconsin to help work on his image in Wisconsin and stump for the Big Idiot that wants to be governor of Wisconsin.

"The Big Idiot wants to cut taxes for the rich and balance the budget by cutting things you don't need, because you are working. He will cut programs like BadgerCare for those people not working or working at a job that offers insurance, like Wal Mart. He also wants to put toll roads in Wisconsin, because you clearly don't pay enough gas taxes." Mr. Gingrich told supporters.

"The Big Idiot drives a Saturn and brags about it. He told me his wife won't let him drive the Lexus. Remember when he said he thought the Milwaukee County Executive made too much money, and that he was going to fix that. He didn't fix it the way he promised, but he did take a ten thousand dollar pay cut this year. Don't you think that makes him perfect for this state?" Mr. Gingrich added.

The crowd of about twenty-five was impressed with Mr. Gingrich's speech, and a gave him his only applause when he claimed he owned Packers stock.

"I like the fact Mr. Gingrich is a good Catholic, too. I mean who else can get divorced twice and still have a good standing in the Catholic Church." Jim De Vanhold, a Big Idiot support, said of Mr. Gingrich. "I would vote for him in 2012, if he ran for president."

Mr. Gingrich said a lot of other things at the rally, but mostly he talked about himself.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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