Janine Lindemulder: "I'll pee in a cup to prove I'm not on drugs." Cup: "I hallucinated for 16 hours afterward."

Funny story written by anthonyrosania

Friday, 18 June 2010

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image for Janine Lindemulder: "I'll pee in a cup to prove I'm not on drugs." Cup: "I hallucinated for 16 hours afterward."
"That is the biggest herpes sore I've ever seen."

Janine Lindemulder, the 42 year old who used to be paid to be filmed having sex, is madder than an Oscar winner with an unfaithful husband, and has come out swinging against Babydaddy Jesse James, allegedly because he has the good sense NOT to hand over his 6-year-old to the admitted drug abuser.

The child, nicknamed "Yeasty" by friends of her mother, was supposed to be returned to Lindemulder after spending 'National Celebrate the Holocaust As A Fun Time For All Weekend" in Austria with James. He refused to return her, claiming that Lindemulder's current drug regimen of AZT and Secanol renders her unfit as a mother.

Lindemulder -stage name Devon Floppytwat- fought back by offering the court a urine sample to prove she is drug free. The actress broke policy by peeing into a coffee cup and handing it to the court reporter, and was directed to give the sample using physician-sanctioned methods.

The court ordered the sample to be tested within 24 hours, largely because it began to eat through the sample cup.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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