Osama bin Laden Set to Testify at Gitmo Trial

Funny story written by Cuff

Wednesday, 14 April 2010

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I Love Americans! With Fava Beans and a nice Chianti.

In a stunning revelation Attorney General Eric Holder announced that President Obama has granted immunity to Osama bin Laden in the upcoming trial of Gitmo detainee Trashma bin Killah.

Killah is known as one of the masterminds of the 911 attacks and bin Laden will appear as a character witness.

As everyone knows President Obama has urged since his campaign to try terrorists in civilian court as opposed to agreeing that we are at war with terrorism. If there isn't a war on terrorism what the cuff are we doing in Iraq and Afghanistan?

Eric Holder, another white guy speaking for the President, fills us in. "How is it fair that we try foreign nationals in a military court which is run by the same people the defendants were shooting at when they were captured? That would be no different than trying a serial killer in the town where the murders took place."

Obama's feeling is that a civilian trial will give America the opportunity to showcase to the world how well our court system works. It works so well that Charles Manson is still alive and well.

In order to guarantee Bin Laden's safety to and from the location of the NYC court Airforce One was sent to pick him up.

Details are secretive but any desperate unemployed patriot that is reading this and who still remembers the World Trade Center can see bin Laden at Grand Central Station Wednesday 2:35 PM wearing a black burka with a red carnation where he is to be transferred to a silver Suburban; Government issued plate WMD-911.

I advise against taking any action but not because it would confuse the American population about the difference between the court system and justice.

The reason I urge caution is that with the Obama regime's latest action of issuing a death warrant on American born terrorist Anwar al-Awlaki, because he is an American, it would place you in the uncomfortable position of the court system's wrath.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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