Garbage Stinks Up Whole Town!

Written by Bureau

Tuesday, 30 March 2010

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Jacob Flartstone Nipping On A Kipper To Hide Smell

Citizens of Sauce Parlor, Arkansas have been complaining about the stenth from a once small garbage area near town that has grown tremendously as the population grew.

"We have tried burying it but the stink still rises to the top", stated Mayor Fred Fozzle. "It does OK at times but then the wind shifts and it's time to stay indoors."

Town council member Jacob Flartstone told us that the smell was keeping customers away from his burger place.

"People say they like our burgers and fries fine and are OK if they order them to take out, but trying to eat one here at the restaurant, they are like shit on a shingle."

Recently, a representative from a national home-delivery cosmetic company decided that their product might just end the bad smell once and for all by offering to dump ten big barrels of pine scent at $1,000 that would help the town out and provide some good publicity for the company and maybe lure shoppers back to Sauce Parlor.

"Yep, we thought we had her licked", stated Mayor Fozzle. "Plus, they let us have the pine spray at cost."

"However, as Flartstone there will tell you, the first big rain and it was even worse."

Asked how it could get even worse, Flartstone replied, "It smelled like somebody shit a Christmas tree."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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