San Bruno, California - Early this morning, former actress, author and businesswoman Suzanne Somers was rushed to a local hospital, when she fell to the floor in a fit of laughter.
Doctors were baffled, until she finally calmed down enough to share with them what had led up to her nearly dieing of laughter.
"I was just sitting there, having a grapefruit and squeezing my ThighMaster2000 between my supple 63 year old legs, when I finally got it.", related Suzanne from her hospital bed.
What she had apparently "got" were the punchlines and points of five seasons worth of jokes, gags and slapstick comedy routines that she had participated in during the run of a show called "Three's Company", which stopped airing back in 1984.
While insiders acknowledge that the show ran eight seasons, Suzanne had left after five seasons, mainly due to her inability to understand the plot nuances and depth of the show.
This morning, it all finally became clear to her, and she realized for the first time that she had not starred in a touching drama about three people trying to survive in the harsh economic and social climate of the seventies, but rather a light hearted romp gently poking fun at our collectively changing values.
"Jack was only pretending to be gay!", Suzanne Somers said, before collapsing again into waves of hysterical laughter. "And Mrs. Roper wanted her husband to have sex with her even though he didn't want to! I get that now!"
Doctors have prescribed bed rest, and a dose of regular daytime TV, guaranteed to kill laughter in any one these days. Her recovery is expected soon.
