Chile - The three kilometer Malavarra Narrows is soon to be spanned by the longest suspension bridge in the world thanks to the efforts of Bernie Stanke whose only claim to fame until now has been plastic surgeon to Nancy Pelosi.
The narrows which many thought could not be linked using current engineering practice was easily engineered by Stanke who used the same daring that led to transplanting Pelosi's super strong vaginal muscles to her face to rip her deltoids and convey the illusion of youth and a forced smile.
"Pelosi still had lots left for us to string up the bridge and then some."
