Florida Woman Busted For Extortion

Funny story written by Illusnist

Saturday, 19 September 2009

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One Florida woman has discovered that life is not a theme park.

A Florida woman woke up to a somber idea this morning. Her plot to extort $50,000 from her husband not only failed, but she is going to have to adjust to wearing jailhouse blues.

In a farce that began on September 4th, when she, and her young lover, allegedly staged a fake kidnapping that spanned 2 counties, and had all of the classic features of a hit movie, including a money drop that was accidentally retrieved by unknowing college students.

In her dreams, the 30-something year old woman has been heard to say, "I am the queen of my world, and I make the rules." In real life, however, the story has turned out to be much different and this morning, she is sharing her breakfast with bull dykes.

The case, which lasted for nearly 10 days and cost taxpayers in excess of $200,000, included state and local law enforcement, the Federal Bureau of Investigation, and some guy named Carl who said, "I just wanted to help, man."

In a public statement, the local Sheriff named most of his undercover police staff, and made several references to information that, as he admitted in the statement, "I probably shouldn't have told you."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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