Barack Obama: An Illegal 'Alien'?

Funny story written by Michael S.

Tuesday, 25 August 2009

There has been much controversy recently concerning the legality of President Barack Obama's residency as a citizen of the United States. A group known as the "Birther Movement" has claimed that he is not a naturalized citizen of the United States and therefore has no legal holding to his presidency. There are other self-proclaimed "Birthers" claiming he is an 'illegal alien'. They do not realize exactly how true their claims are. For not only is President Barack Obama a legal resident of the United States, he is not even a resident to our planet.

This shocking news comes to light after months of investigation into President Obama's naturaized birth. It was stumbled upon during the investigation that a private detective by the name of L. Lawliet discovered several anomalies into the birth of Barack Obama. After interviewing Mr. Lawliet about the fact President Obama was an alien, he stated:

"Firstly was the fact that Mr. Obama was born in Hawaii. As any astrologist will tell you, Hawaii is a known hot zone for UFO sitings. On the day before Mr. Obama was allegidly born in Hawaii there were a record number of sitings in the sky that night. All reports concluded with the same description of a bright blue triangular light set in the sky. The very next day a child was born to a woman by the name of Ann Dunham."

As he stacked sugar cubes, Det. Lawliet continued to explain how people surrounding Barack Obama's birth acted rather oddly when interviewed. Many had blank expressionless faces when answering, as well, others recalled the memory of his birth and recalled it almost as though it were read out of a book. Not to mention the reported dissapearance of Ann Dunham nine months previous. When asked, she stated, "I went for a walk." Considering Ms. Dunham was missing for a week, many find her story questionable.

Det. Lawliet continued furthermore to state that President Obama has never made a blood transfusion or ever been sick his whole life as research of hospitals bring up no record of President Obama ever checking in the hospital for any grievences. A childhood friend stated "He never sweat, even on the hottest days, he claimed it was a glandular problem." As well, there had been various occasions where Mr. Obama would be found ouside at night staring out into the sky mumbling under his breath the same thing, "Why me?" A possible referendum to his future fate as the leader of the free world.

His mother stated, "A lot of the time Barack would dissapear for hours and return as if nothing happened. He claimed he was out with his 'friends'. When I asked his friends about it they denied ever even seeing Barack for at least a month. I asked myself where he could possibly be going? Nobody on the island ever saw him when he was gone. I figured he found his own secret club house and thought nothing more of it."

Many could question the reasons for his actions and no one could get it right. Was President Obama put here for a reason greater than presidency? Could he be a messiah sent here to save mankind? Or is he a wolf in sheeps clothing waiting to destroy the world? One thing is for certain. There are many questions surrounding the birth of Barack Obama. And the possibility of his planting here by an intelligent, more evolved species leads us to question: What is Barack Obama's true purpose for this little planet we call Earth?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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