Written by Bureau

Saturday, 25 July 2009

image for New US Health Czar "You Idiots WILL Obey Me!"

Former Kansas Governor Kathleen Sebelius, who was sworn in as Secretary of Health and Human Services by the United States Senate on April 29, 2009 is taking her Health Czar appointment by President Obama seriously.

Yesterday, Sebelelius received the top secret just discovered cure for the Swine Flu, the only copy as the scientist who found it was eliminated by one of his staff and sold to the Secretary.

"Unless the United States fall in order behind me and my president, Barack Obama, none of you little people out there will get a drop of this stuff."

"Also, you're going to pay dearly for using it or you're going to pay even more dearly by not using it as it mutated again over the past weekend."

"What we need, I and Omama, the US leader under my Czarship, is lots and lots of tax monies to balloon the size of government up to only a few of us will be in control. You will also have a computer chip in your billfold and your ass in case you lose your billfold, if you want to avoid a horrible squealing death."

"So I will begin Monday morning when you will recieve my recorded messages at your local city offices on how much to send us and we will then notify when you are to show up for your Swine Flu shot and your two chip implants."

Sebelius then told reporters that she is the Czar and no one, not ever Big Ears or Plug Head will get their shots and chips until SHE says so.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Health




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