Saturday, 4 July 2009

image for Four New Supreme Court Associate Justices Sworn In

Washington DC: In addition to Sonia Sotomayor, three other nominees of President Obama, namely Oprah Winfrey, Barbara Walters and Joan Rivers will be sworn in as new Supreme Court Associate Justices.

The latter three new appointments are only for a single term beginning on the first Monday in October 2009. During the Supreme Court Summer picnic Chief Justice John Roberts, Associate Justice Samuel Alito and Associate Justice Clarence Thomas wandered into a Poison Ivy patch. The justices were unhurt, but developed a severe rash and itch that will keep them off the bench for the upcoming court session.

President Obama acted swiftly providing the US Senate with a bevy of nominee's names. The US Senate approved Oprah Winfrey, Barbara Walters and Joan Rivers. (The US Senate "borked" David Letterman by a vote of 100-0.) Associate Justice Paul Stevens will act as interim Chief Justice.

Attorney General Erick Holder has asked the Supreme Court to review some previous cases during the next session. These cases include, but are not limited to Marlborough Vs Madison, Dred Scott, Roe Vs Wade, Brown Vs the Board of Education and the New Haven, CT Firefighters case.

The other four Associate Justices could not be reached for comment.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Court




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