New candidate raids Kerry's Veep call

Funny story written by Frank Cotolo

Tuesday, 6 July 2004

image for New candidate raids Kerry's Veep call
Supporters of new candidate wave their banners at John Kerry.

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a strange campaign happening, public support for a man named Kerry Edwards in the '04 Presidential race surfaced just moments after candidate John Kerry opened a rally in Pittsburgh.

The new candidate was not present, but his supporters waved signs with his name on them--Kerry Edwards.

"We don't know who Kerry Edwards is," said a John Kerry campaign aid. "Is he even a Democrat?"

This was a bad time for a new candidate's debut, since John Kerry was holding the rally to announce his running mate, John Edwards.

"Whoever this guy is it is going to be very confusing to voters since his name is Kerry Edwards and those are the last names of the Democrat's probable candidates."

It could be considered a coincidence that the new candidate has the two names he has, but history shows that other candidates had similar problems.

A Johnson Humphrey entered the Presidential race in 1964, according to documents that were written back then.

And in 1968, a Humphrey Muskie won the Missouri Democratic primary.

Mr. Kerry and Mr. Edwards were unavailable for comments, but Mr. Kerry told reporters, "I am all for people who have given and surnames that resemble Presidential candidates."

Mr. Edwards agreed. He said, "One of my children, a boy, is named Jack, like in Jack Kennedy, although his Jack's name was really John. My name is John and Mr. Kerry's name is John and neither of us are referred to as Jack. Go figure."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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