Boston,Ma/ The Boston Bugle - Saying" enough is enough", President Barry O'Bama, blood brother of Massachusetts Governor Deval "Cadillac" Patrick, today appointed a Czar to oversee patronage in the corrupt Irish/Italian Mafia State, thereby taking the heat off Patrick who's approval ratings have sunk lower than Barney Frank's Boxer shorts in a Province Town Public Rest Room during Gay Pride Week.
Reaching out, Obama picked former Governor Michael Dukakis to take the reins giving him full power to cancel all grand jury indictments, and in fact dismiss any and all government prosecutors who are even thinking of pursuing corruption investigations involving African Americans, Italians, or Irishmen(women) politicians.
A sigh of relief was heard from the toll booths of the Mass Turnpike Authority where relatives of political hacks make $90K a year "plus Tips", to the no show janitors in the state court houses, the judges with 2 DUI's, and the last three indicted speakers of the State Legislature....not to mention O'bama's relative ordered deported 4 years ago living for free in a Roxbury housing development while someone tries to figure things out.
The Democratic machine which oversaw the election of Patrick was the working model for the presidential campaign of Barack O'Bama which was wildly successful built on lots of curb appeal, , high sounding rhetoric, the Kennedy Mystique, and lip gloss which has soon descended into an enema suppository for the Massachusetts taxpayer, now also serving as role model for the rest of the country as the economy turns to shit and the taxpayer foots the bills.
Meanwhile Massachusetts business men are preparing to close up their businesses and flee the state to more acceptable climes like South Carolina, New Hampshire, and even Costa Rica.
Larry O' Riggin, a converted African American now almost white and of the Irish Faith, had a successful small business that employed about 15 people on a year round basis, and always voted Democratic due to his adopted race , religion, and the fact his Priest scared the shit out of him.
When we caught up with Larry recently, he was busy closing down his yard and show room where he sold recycled Canadian lawn furniture, pre- weathered cedar pickets, vinyl raincoats , damp bags of powdered cement , chinese condoms, lottery tickets and the occational 6-pack of San Miguel.
"Just goin' man....white man can't make it no mo'....better off joinin' my Octoroon brother George from Kenya, just over here on welfare...boy got no job, they GIVES him a welfare car.
"Got no phone they GIVES em a cell phone with 68 free minutes a month....fucker called 911 yesterday when they ran out of that new grilled chicken at the chicken store.....
."Got himself a nice pad, had his teeth recapped, got a month supply of viagra....then they told 'em if he had any thoughts that were anti- american they probably have to send him off to Bermuda......
"I'm gone man....Blue Cross went up 28%, goin' tax my cell phone I needs for my men, tellin' me I gots to join the ACORN Union, raise my tolls, lost my 401K. .....tax,tax,tax .....
"then they send that Pay Czar around tell me how much I be allowed to make this year....then that Car Czar come around tell me I gots to drive that Italian car and sell my Kenworths and buy them Fiats for delivery trucks.....fuckin' wops can't deliver the mail on time in Italy, and I'm goin have to drive them shit boxes with an Italian Warranty! O'bama can come kiss my (almost) white Irish Ass....."
When queried where he was headed, as he packed up the last of his personal items from his ransacked office, Larry had only this to say: "Where else, man, going back to my roots, going back to Chicago where I can be Black again and get a little piece of what's owed me...fuck this bein' white shit...it jest don' pay!"