"Bikini Girl" To Tour With The Jonas Brothers

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 22 May 2009

image for "Bikini Girl" To Tour With The Jonas Brothers
"Bikini Girl" reading and signing her Jonas Brothers opening act contract.

NEW YORK CITY - The Kuddly Koala Talent Management Agency which manages the Jonas Brothers has just released a news report that Katrina Darrell, alias Bikini Girl will be going on tour with the Jonas Brothers this summer.

The 83-city concert tour which is being hailed as The Jonas Brothers & Bikini Girl Happy As Heck Summertime Funtime Tour will kick off in Shreveport, Louisiana at The Boudreau and Tiffanette Charlemagne Convention Center.

When the brothers, who hail from New Jersey, first found out that Bikini Girl was going to be their opening act they let out a collective "Yes!!!"

Sixteen-year-old Nick said that when he saw her on the American Idol finale show, he told himself right away that because of her radiant smile she would make a great opening act for their upcoming summer tour.

Joe, who is 19, said that he could not agree more. And 21-year-old Kevin who is actually one year older than Katrina said that he likes the fact that she is just like the girl-next-door. (EDITOR'S NOTE: Yeah, if you happen to live next door to a Hooter's Restaurant).

Kevin was asked if they had any problem with the fact that they had already signed Rod Stewart to be their opening act.

He replied that Rod totally agreed with their decision and he was really thrilled when he was told that he would be allowed to keep the entire amount that his contract had called for.

Joe said that he had talked to Katrina on the night of the American Idol finale. He said that she is so down-to-earth normal except of course for the fact that she has like about 127 ex-boyfriends and tremendously big (blanks).

Nick said that he also spoke to her, but he said that he had a little trouble hearing her over the commotion what with Kit Kat's catfight with American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi and all.

He remarked that Katrina told him that DioGuardi had started it by calling her a talentless, humorless, sugarless fake-boobed boob.

When Nick told Katrina that the Jonas Brothers did not use words like fake-boobed, she apologized and changed it to fake grapefruited.

Joe says that he can hardly wait for the tour because he understands that Katrina is a very good Pictionary player.
And Joe currently holds the state of New Jersey Teenage Pictionary Title.

Kevin was asked if Katrina would appear on the billing as:

The Jonas Brothers with opening act Katrina Darrell.

He grinned and said that actually they had unanimously agreed that the billing would read:

The Jonas Brothers with opening act,
The Very Exposed and Delicious-Looking Bikini Girl.

Meanwhile Katrina's manager, Sol Goldenburger said that he sent out a call to audition for musicians to form Kat's band and he said that he received 18,457 replies.

Goldenburger did reveal that the name of Katrina's band, which the brothers did approve, will be Bikini Girl & The Boobalicious Band

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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