Written by rfreed

Friday, 17 April 2009

image for Death Of American Dream Brings Epiphany To Many
Merle's homelessness has actually opened up new worlds of possibilities for him.

Thousands of Americans have experienced the epiphany of having the illusion of the American Dream drop from them like the cocoon from a butterfly, especially in the trying economic circumstances of the last few months.

"It's like I've died and been born again!" exclaimed Mr. John Lostpenny. "A year ago I was the brightest sales clerk in the men's department, always pushing for sales; half a year later I was laid off, now here I am out on the street with only Salvation Army hand-me-downs to wear. But I am free-e-e-e!" he said as he danced in a circle outside his tent.

"Me and the kids have so many more adventures now." said Mrs. Poorhouse, an ex-cashier at a grocery store put out of business by a giant Walmart." inside the abandoned building where they had a campfire going. "Before I'd trudge off to work every day and come back home tired. Now we experience so much life just having to scrap around for food that it has taken on whole new meaning."

"We aren't blinded by the illusion that America has a bright future for us any more." yelled Larry Slackoff above the voices and loud music in the crowded apartment that he shared with ten other friends. "We know that we're stuck in a dead end and those at the top want it all for themselves, so we might as well party hearty and stay high! Which we do!" he said as he grabbed a passing leggy blond and pulled her down to himself.

"It is a real load off my back!" said former accountant Timothy Redink from his boat where he moved all his stuff too when he moved out of his apartment. " It's like an enlightenment. Money only buys so much. There is so much else to life if you aren't confined by a job."

We can sincerely thank the greedy upper echelon that run this country for our chance to come back to the simpler things of life. They have successfully undermined the work ethic of the lower classes to where it is actually more fulfilling to be a slacker than to put out the effort to work.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: Economy, America

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more